Rain Drop

Hmm...it's been an eventful day...I suppose. It started off with talking to Fang on MSN very very early in the morning, then came the awfully boring classes, followed by a little hang out with Du. After that, a bunch of little things put together this day. It's been strange, but nice...tiring, but fun and yet, I feel like it's missing something. Oh yes, a blog post about it =).

So lets start with talking to Fang. It was really nice talking to her...much like every other time haha. She's in China so it was in the afternoon for her when we started talking. At the time, I just went through an amazing game run with a couple of buddies and to be honest, I was dead tired. While talking with Lee about our dreadful English assignment, Fang came online and said "hullllooo =)." Hmm...makes me smile =P. The chat went fairly quickly and in the process, I learned what a "night market" was and by the sounds of it, I've gotta get some friends together and roam through the streets of Vancouver at night buying the "Asian-styled foods" and just chill. It sounds like such a fun time. Too bad Calgary doesn't have it. Freaking hell...Calgary doesn't have anything -.-''. Ah well, that's another point. Yea...so I talked to her for about an hour and all of a sudden I felt extremely tired and weary of the day ahead of me. Most of the time, I wouldn't care what time it was and we'd just talk until I basically feel like passing out...or until she yells at me for staying up too late, but this morning...I had to step away from the computer and say hello to my bed. I think a big factor is that I knew I had to wake up early in the morning and that was something I haven't done ever since before IB exams so...I was pretty scared about waking up late and being late for Henderson's class...she's quite scary these days, pounding our asses to get back into the working mode for one last diploma exam. Aight...I just realized I went on to a complete tangent, but anyway, I left the conversation pretty abruptly...

Something is bothering me about it though...the conversations that I have with Fang...I feel like I'm not being myself, which is a bad thing -.-''. I'm not sure what it really is...maybe I really want to talk to her...or maybe it's because I'm scared she'll find me uninteresting, but something along those lines are preventing me from being the carefree guy that I deem myself to be most of the time. I feel like I'm treading on water when I'm talking to her...scared of doing something stupid...scared of making her upset maybe. None the less, it's an annoying feeling and I wish it would go away. I blame it on MSN. I've never been a big fan of it, talking emotionlessly through words on the internet. Feels...fake. I think I'm a very animated person in terms of body language so when I don't have the opportunity to be animated, it feels something is missing. I don't feel like...myself. Yes...it's bothering me. On the other hand, it's the only way that we're able to keep in touch...talk about anything and it's very entertaining every time I talk to her. I know, I know, there's a device called the telephone, but I'm not a big phone person. Especially since I don't actually talk that much...most of the time the person on the other end thinks that I'm bored and gets uncomfortable...this is a BAD thing. Anyway, I guess I can't really do much about it...I'll try my best to be myself. It's hard! Why's it so damn hard?! Stupid...stupid...

Moving on, I went to hang out with Du today...(yea, I skipped the school part of the day...sue me). She had violin so I went to listen. It was quite nice. Talented little girl. Can't believe how far she's come in just 10 months of playing violin...and to top that off, she barely practices >.>''. Some people and their musical talents hey? So yea, we got something to eat afterwards and I took her half way home because it was raining pretty badly. I had the umbrella so it felt right to at least provide some sort of assistance so she doesn't get sick. The rain was nice though...although I kept on thinking back to early in the morning how much of an idiot I must have been like, it also reminded me of some good times =P. After I took her half way home, I rode the bus to a C-train station...the bus ride felt like forever and I fell asleep. I didn't miss the station though, so that's good =P. Or else, I would of had to ride the bus all the way back to the first C-train station, which would have not been fun. Anyway, Du and I talked about stuff...and during the course of the conversations, I realized that she was one of the few friends that I could slightly open up to. She's made quite the impact in my life and time is ticking away before we go our separate ways. I feel like deep inside she has some things she wants to tell me, but still isn't comfortable enough to say yet. Not that I'll be able to do anything about it, most likely, but to be able to find that comfort with someone where you can tell them anything and not feel awkward about it is a rare thing. I just hope she doesn't keep those things locked up and is always looking back on it. The past will always be the past, the future, you might be able to influence, but it's the present that really matters. Hold on tight to everything you cherish and don't take for granted anything. Then...when friends do branch off to their own paths, there'll be no regrets.

I guess I really wanted to post these couple of things because I went for a drive tonight in the rain. No one had keys to the store I worked at so I had to drive up there and lock the door. I didn't mind it that much. It was quite relaxing just driving the car and listening to the radio. On the drive back, when I wasn't really rushing anymore, it felt nice...liberated. That's when I put my day together and decided that I wanted to post something. So I can remember this day later on =P. Anyway, I should do some reading before I head off to bed. Hope everything is going well with everyone's lives and remember, when something is getting you down, you just gotta Keep On Moving. =).

If you don't want to watch the video...just read the lyrics, it might cheer you up xP.

I woke up today with this feeling,
That better things are coming my way,
I bet the sunshine has a meaning,
And till nothing's gonna get in my way,

When the rainy days are dying,
Gotta keep on, keep on trying,
All the bees and birds are flying (ahhhhhh),
Never look oh you gotta hold on and
Not stop till the break of dawn and
Keep moving, don't stop rocking(ahhhhh)

Get on up, when you're down, baby
Take a good look aroud, I know it's not much, But it's ok, Keep on moving on anyway,

Feels like I should be screaming
Trying'a get it through to my friends
Sometimes it feels that life has no meaning
But I know things'll be alright in the end

When the rainy days are dying,
Gotta keep on, keep on trying,
All the bees and birds are flying (ahhhhhhhh)
Never look oh you gotta hold on and,
Not stop till the break of dawn and
Keep moving, don't stop rocking (ahhhhhhhh)

Get on up, when you're down, baby
Take a good look around, I know it's not much,
But it's ok, keep on moving on anyway,

When the rainy days are dying,
Gotta keep on, keep on trying,
All the bees and birds are flying (ahhhhh)
Never look and you gotta hold on and
Not stop till the break of dawn and
Keep on moving don't stop rocking(ahhhhhh)

Get on up, when you're down, baby
take a good look around I know it's not much,
but it's ok, keep on moving on anyway.

Repeat chorus x2

Get on up (keep on moving, keep on moving, keep on moving...)

I know it's not much (keep on moving, keep on moving, keep on moving...)

Get on up (Keep on moving, keep on moving, Keep on moving)

Note to self: Show Fang the grad video.

Secret #29: Be myself, be patient, be there for you...one day, these little things might touch your heart =).